A Chance Meeting
by quotheraven
Summary: When a series of chance meetings lead to more. Set between Hogfather/Jingo and Thief of Time/Fifth Elephant. Susan x Angua.
1. Chapter 1

Susan awoke suddenly to the sound of breaking glass. Her first thought was something supernatural, possibly even a monster, before she dismissed these thoughts as ridiculous. After all, monsters didn't come in through windows. Grabbing the poker for safety, she climbed out of bed and headed towards the source of the sound.

By the time she got there, the room was empty, the safe was cracked open, and the window was broken. Sighing, she turned to look at Twyla, who had come to investigate, and said, "Go back to sleep, I'll be back in a few minutes." She looked out the window and caught glimpse of a figure running away. Then, she carefully climbed out the window, down a drain pipe, and leapt to the cobblestones below.

She began to run after the dark figure, trying to get within earshot. The Voice was useful, but not if it couldn't be heard. She began to worry that she would lose him and considered stopping time, but after what had happened the last time, she decided against it.* Suddenly, she heard a howl, and the retreating figure was tackled by a much larger one. The larger shape retreated into an alley for a moment, then exited looking quite different. At least, Susan was fairly certain it was the same one. Whatever had entered had been large and hairy, and as she got closer, she saw that the new figure was petite, female, human, and decidedly nude. Despite herself, Susan felt a red blush creep into her cheeks. _It's just the heat_ , she told herself. The figure looked up, it gave a start, then stepped back into the alley.

"Uh, City Watch, carry on," it said hastily, but Susan continued forward. _After all,_ she though, _he did steal from_ my _house._ Susan heard the rasping of cloth, the chink of metal, and then the guard exited the alley again, this time fully clothed. Susan walked over to the would-be thief, reached down, and grabbed the bag full of gold that her employers kept in their safe.

"What are you doing?" said the woman behind her. "Just retrieving what this man stole from me," replied Susan, turning around calmly. The guard looked at her for a moment, then nodded, and moved to cuff the criminal. Susan stared for a moment, shook herself, then turned to walk back to the house. "Stay out of trouble," she heard the guard call behind her as Susan turned the corner.

*Ankh Morpork had enough magical disturbances as it was. It had rained frogs (or at least something like frogs) the last time Susan had interfered by freezing time within the city.


	2. Chapter 2

Angua set down her truncheon slowly, dreading the thought of going back to Mrs. Cake's. Usually she stayed with Carrot, but now…

Feeling resigned, she walked out the door and started towards the house, when she passed Beirs. The more she thought about it, the more inviting a cocktail sounded. Turning on her heels, she entered the bar. Everyone glanced up for a moment, then went back to their drinks*. The Igor behind the bar asked, "What'll it be?" without looking up.

"A bottle of whiskey," Angua said evenly. The Igor looked up at her, surprised for a moment, then winked knowingly.

"I heard about you and Captain Carrot. This one is on the house," he said, pouring her a small glass of a clear liquid. She downed it in one go, felt a small burn in her throat, and then washed it down with whiskey.

*A drink being defined here as anything fluid or semifluid that can be drunk, slurped, or otherwise swallowed by a creature, living or otherwise.

Susan carefully added the thirtieth mark to the column, then grinned victoriously. One month, 30 days, a twelfth of a year, four weeks with not a single supernatural incident. There had been the break in, but that had just been a human. An annoying human admittedly, but just a human.

To celebrate thirty straight days of normalcy, she was going to Beirs. The drinks weren't the best, but at least no one stared at the raven.

As she walked down the street, it appeared that people moved out of her way. In fact, people were simply not where she was. A tavern brawl that had moved outside stopped suddenly as the pugilists found themselves sidling towards the edge of the street for no apparent reason.

She was almost to Beirs when she heard a flutter of wings and a voice say, "Trying to ditch me? You know what he gets like if I don't keep an eye on you."

Susan sighed. Quoth the raven had been instructed by her grandfather to "keep an eye on her" after their last encounter with the Auditors. She found it disconcerting when changing, but besides that the only impact was the curious stares when inside.

She entered the building quietly, walking up to the bar without interruption. The patrons of Beirs were generally a quiet sort, who went there to drink without being bothered by other drinkers, other people, or (especially) an angry mob. Knowing that no matter how much she drank, she would never get more than tipsy, Susan ordered a large bottle of mead. The Igor handed it over without comment, and accepted the cold iron coins stoically. As he put them away, he glanced at another patron. The guard was on her 6th glass, and he was beginning to get worried. Hitting a bothersome werewolf with his club was one thing, but she was a guard. Vimes would go spare if he found out.


	3. Chapter 3

As Susan drained her cup, she reflected that accepting a 'new' drink from Igor without asking the ingredients first had probably been a mistake. Suddenly, one of the other drinkers unsuccessfully tried to stand up, and fell against the bar; Susan glanced over at the familiar face of the guard, sighed, and walked over. _She stopped the burglar. I should make sure she gets home._ She nodded at Igor as she supported the blonde's weight.

"I'll make sure she's alright. Just…where does she live?"

Igor frowned at the impropriety for a moment before realizing that the alternative was having an angry, drunk werewolf remain in the bar.

"She lives over at Mrs. Cakes', last time I checked."

Head spinning, she half-led, half-carried the woman towards Mrs. Cakes' building. _What was in that drink, wood alcohol?_ As they walked, the blonde began to show signs of life, and by the time they arrived at the right door, she was supporting her own weight.

"'nks for helpin me," she slurred, fumbling for her key.

Susan sighed and reached into the women's pocket, ignoring where her hand was as she extracted the key. She led the guard to the bed, using the walls for support. _I'm going to have a hangover tomorrow. Twyla is going to love this._ The guard began to undress, apparently oblivious to Susan's presence; she turned to leave, when she suddenly stepped onto something about 8 inches long, and very hard*, hitting the ground with a thud. She tried to stand up as the room spun, and then she was upright, the blonde supporting _her_ weight. Susan noticed that the woman was shirtless, and tried to step back, blushing furiously from head to toe, and everywhere in between. The women stepped forward, mumbling, "Don't go." And suddenly their lips were meeting…

*A dog bone. Get your mind out of the gutter.


	4. Chapter 4

_Images rushed through Susan's mind. Her hands cupping breasts, her mouthing moving lower and lower, a back arched in pleasure…_

Susan woke to dawn's early light, head pounding. The last thing she remembered clearly was tripping over that damn bone. After that, it was all a blur. She glanced over at the sleeping form of the blonde, and quietly slipped out of bed. As she got dressed, she considered the best way to keep the children occupied today. A trip to the park was out of the question, but perhaps she could bring Binky to them. Mrs. Gaiter could hardly object to such a noble* animal as Binky, and the children would spend hours with the horse without getting bored.

She straightened her cloak, and opened the door cautiously, glancing back at the woman one more time. Being Death's granddaughter did not lend itself to a good relationship; dating became awkward when you occasionally saw your partner as 40 years older than you. However, that didn't mean Susan didn't deserve some fun every once in a while. _Of course,_ she thought, _it'd be nice to remember the fun._

Susan arrived at the Gaiter house half an hour before she was due to wake the children up, and began to make a pot of tea. A few minutes later, Mr. Gaiter walked past her blearily, and poured himself a cup. As he unfolded a copy of The Times, she walked up the stairs to wake Twyla and Gawain. Her hangover was disappearing quickly, but she thought it best to avoid the noise of the park. Besides, the children really would enjoy Binky.

*In the mind of Mrs. Gaiter, any animal owned by a duchess was noble.

Angua opened her eyes blearily. She didn't remember much of last night, but she'd somehow made it back to her room. She stood up to get ready for work, and realized she was naked. That was odd. She found her shirt and cloak in a pile, and the rest of her clothes strewn about.

 _What happened last night?_ Half formed images flitted in and out of her mind, but she pushed them away. She would have to run to get to Pseudopolis Yard on time.

 _Oh gods. Pseudopolis Yard. Carrot._ Reluctantly, she pulled on her shirt. 

Angua looked up as the front door slammed open. She'd been working on paperwork for the past few hours, and the sun was nearly setting. She hadn't seen Carrot all day. Maybe he'd been patrolling.

"There's some sort of disturbance over on Lance Street, by the fountain!"

"Well why aren't you dealing with it?" Angua asked roughly. _Carrot will be there; I just know it._

"Well, I'm about to get off, see, and I promised my girl I'd…"

Angua looked around for Vimes or Colon or even Nobbs, but the only other guard in the room was one of the new dwarves.

"Fine," she sighed, putting on her helmet.


	5. Chapter 5

Susan walked quickly down Lance Street, following her senses. She'd felt the same malice that caused toast to fall butter-side-down emanating from that direction for the past hour. She'd gone one month without this sort of thing. Apparently that was all she was going to get.

As she got nearer to the source of that malice, she heard the sounds of a crowd. In Ankh-Morpork that could mean anything from street entertainment to a cataclysmic disaster. Moving through the people like an arrow, she finally reached the center of the crowd.

 _It's a rock. A giant bloody rock._ Lying in a small crater, where there used to be a fountain, was a large rock, covered in char marks.

 _Of course they'd use rocks. Rocks are predictable._

Angua ran towards the fountain, dodging through the crowd as she got closer. When finally arrived at the scene, she found the source of the disturbance. No one appeared to be hurt, but she looked around for any witnesses, when her eyes caught on a strange circle of empty space at the edge of the crowd. There was something off about it. She tried to make out a scent… and she suddenly realized there was a woman in the center. _A nearly invisible woman with her own bubble of space; she might be related to the…rock._ The idea sounded stupid even in her head, but she went to investigate.

"Ma'am, what are you doing here?" she asked, approaching the woman. It was easy to keep track of her as long as she focused on the scent. The woman looked up in surprise, and Angua stopped. Memories flickered through her mind: the bar, the walk home, her bed…

"You can se… oh, it's you. Why are you interrogating me?"

Angua snapped her mouth shut. "Interr… I'm not. Look, about last night, I'm not… I don't… it was an accident. It never happened."

An expression of hurt flashed across the woman's face, but was quickly replaced with an impassive gaze.

"Of course." She turned to walk away. Guilt rushed through Angua. _She did help me home. That was a bit harsh._

"Wait. I'm sorry, that was rude. I didn't mean to…" she broke off as she saw a familiar head of red hair heading down the street.

"Blast! I've got to hide." Moving on instinct she grabbed the woman's arm, and dragged her into a nearby alley. Only then did she realize that this wasn't a crime, and she didn't need to protect a bystander.

"Uh.. sorry, that was instinct. I'm sorry again. Can you just leave the back…" she trailed off when she realized this was a dead end.

"Could you just wait a few minutes? Please?"

The woman paused for a moment, then nodded. Angua peaked around the corner, and saw a small shape detach itself from Carrot and head towards the alley.

"Gaspode," she whispered, "don't bring him over here. Just… let me know when he leaves."

"Of course. That's all it is. No ' _How are you?'_ or _'Do you want a biscuit?'_ just orders." He sighed, or at least huffed. "I'll let you know when he's gone." The dog stalked off to sniff the trash.

"So you have a talking dog?" Angua turned around in shock.

"You can hear him?"

"Of course. You weren't whispering very quietly."

"No, I mean… never mind. You don't seem very surprised."

"Well, I have a talking raven," Susan stated matter-of-factly.

"You have a… what!"

Susan looked around, then gave a brief whistle. A dark shape descended from a nearby rooftop, and landed on her shoulder.

"Who is this now?" The raven croaked.

"You have. A talking raven."

"And you have a talking dog."

"Fair enough." Angua glanced around the corner.

"He's still there. He's taking reports! On a rock! We'll be here for an hour." The raven looked at the alley wall, then croaked.

"In case you ladies are interested, there's a door there that leads into a bar." The girls exchanged glances, sighed, then walked into the bar. They looked for a back entrance, but the only other door was right in the middle of the square.

Angua glanced over at the girl.

"If we're gonna wait, we might as well get drinks."


End file.
